this was written during a rather torrid affair with a very strong top...it was a very interesting ride, awakened a lot of things i didn't know (or had forgotten) were within me...

written during lab at school, november 18, 2002

joe
who are you?
often after you
leave me
i think
"i won't call her
again"
but i do
i think you have
too much power
over me, and
yet
i love it
i give it
willingly
i love your strength
your passion
i want to obey you
i want to submit
be whatever you tell me to be
sometimes
between times
i get scared
of your power
but when you're
here
and i'm in your control
my fear
becomes
my arousal
feeding each other
in a
never-ending
spiral of desire
whether your touch is
gentle
- which is rare! -
or rough
it sets me on fire
makes me feel so real
so alive
i don't love you
and
i know you don't love me
but we are good together
and that is enough
isn't it?
still i wish you would
let me
touch you
pleasure you
taste you
i wish i could see you
out of control
helpless
cumming and screaming and crying
but i know
i never will
so you'll be my
mystery lover
the one my friends doubt
even exists
my shadow lover
never seen by anyone
but me
and
probably soon
you'll disappear, like a shadow at high noon
leaving only the memory
of your touch
in the bruises on my
tender skin

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