at my midwife-attended birth, my progress was repeatedly monitored using a doppler fetoscope and cervical checks, and i was informed by an external source what was happening within my body.	at my unassisted birth, i had only myself to rely on for information. i talked to my baby, and i listened to my intuition. i didn't need tools or examinations to know that my birth was happening normally.
at my midwife-attended birth, my midwife told me it was time to push because a vaginal exam had told her i was 10 centimeters dilated. i didn't feel ready to push, at least not in the way she wanted me to, but i did it because she said it was time. i pushed for 45 minutes, my baby remaining posterior until just before he crowned, then rotating very painfully (for me, at least). i know my baby was somewhat strained by my pushing efforts because i remember the midwife telling me to "breathe better" and hearing his heartbeat speeding up when i did.	at my unassisted birth, i pushed only when i could not do anything but push, and it took less than five minutes and only a couple of pushes before he was born. i know my baby was not the least bit strained by this few minutes of pushing.
after my midwife-attended birth, i felt uncertain about my ability to mother my baby, and i frequently called my midwife to ask "silly" questions.	after my unassisted birth, i knew that my instincts had given me the ability to mother my baby just as i had birthed him...on my own, without experts to "help" (or more likely, hinder!) me.
after my midwife-attended birth i felt dependent, weak, uncertain, and disempowered.	after my unassisted birth i felt independent, strong, confident, and empowered.

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